If anyone is like me, you have a few friend groups. And, with that, thought at least on one occasion how fun it would be to introduce one assemblage to another.
How did it go for you? For me? Not so great.
There’s always someone – or several – who require a lot more attention than everyone else. They, alone or in a group, stand in the corner and look forlorn, their eyes following me wherever I go, practically begging me to talk to them.
And only them.
What’s a host to do?
My brother had this figured out decades ago. He said he never wanted his worlds colliding, a strict tenet to which he always abided.
After my 40th birthday, which was a while ago, albeit, I decided that I too would make sure not to place myself in that situation again.
There were friends – old and new, current and former coworkers from two different companies, and parents of our kids’ friends. All dearly loved by me, but each with separate inside jokes and shared interests between us.
It left me uncomfortable, on edge, and not having much fun as I tried to make every one of them feel comfortable, important, and included. I vowed never to do that to myself again.
As I’ve seen in memes, there’s work me, friend me, family me, indoor me, outside me – all Teri but slightly different versions. I’m not lying to anyone or trying to hide anything but juggling friends’ unique personalities can be exhausting.
Sure, there are some friends that can freely drift between groups, but they are few and far between.
As such, I’m no longer interested in being the center of attention while trying to put everyone at ease.
I now prefer to hang out in couples or small groups so I can devote enough time and attention to those I love.
The next time two – or more – of my worlds collide may be at my funeral but hey, I won’t be around to play referee. I’ll just be in my urn, relaxed and content.
49 and Counting 